What in the World is Perception Checking?

   Have you ever been in a situation where a friend or family member said something and you had no idea what they meant? Have you ever thought you understood the message someone was trying to get across only to find out later that you were way off the mark? Perception checking is a great way to make sure that you truly "get the message." 

   Three main components make up perception checking. The first step is describing the behavior you noticed. Second, you want to give at least two possible interpretations of the behavior. Finally, you want to request clarification about how to interpret the behavior. More often than not, our first interpretation of what is being communicated is incorrect. When we fail to understand each other, we 

can become frustrated. Frustration in turn can lead us to act out in unusual ways, much like the kangaroo to the left who for some reason found it necessary to display its emotions in an inappropriate manner. The book tells us on page 105 that perception checking "minimizes defensiveness by preserving the other person's face." I felt that the kangaroo demonstrates this point very well. If the photographer and the animal could have understood each other properly, this dispute wouldn't have gotten out of hand.

   In my own personal life, I have often found that understanding people is one of the most difficult tasks we face. It's easy to misunderstand what other people are trying to say. I remember growing up my brother struggled with his speech. He would say sounds that to him had 

a direct meaning, but to the rest of the family sounded like gibberish. I remember he would become aggravated because of this speech barrier. If he would have been older I could have described his behavior, given him two of my interpretations of what I thought it meant, and then requested clarification. This process is very useful in eliminating misunderstanding.

   I plan on using perception checking in my everyday life and hope that this blog will encourage you to do the same. By effectively understanding one another we can become happier and more efficient; we also can avoid some awkward situations like the one "Mr. Whiskers" is experiencing above.

Contagion: Emotions are Spreading!

   

   In 2011, Steven Soderbergh directed a movie entitled Contagion which walks you through essentially what would happen if a global virus swept across the planet. The film portrays a virus that has the potential to kill off the human race. The poster above broadcasts "Nothing spreads like fear." Fear is not the only emotion that can travel. Chapter 4 discusses the concept of an emotional contagion, which is the process by which emotions are transferred from one person to another. Any emotion can travel. If you are happy at work, chances are the people you are working with will begin to cheer up as well. This is a powerful idea because it shows how one person's attitude can affect the lives of an unlimited amount of people. After I thought about this concept for a while I found myself trying to be more positive because I didn't want to drag anyone else down with my negativity.

    "If Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy." This popular household sign is a good example of an emotional contagion. When the mother of the house is in a good mood, everyone is in a better mood. The opposite is true as well. When I'm at my house and my mom is upset about something, everyone in my house is a little on edge. It's a fascinating concept.

Momma ain't happy