You Named Me What?!

     We may not realize it, but what we are named plays a vital role in our lives. Chapter 5 says that, "...names are more than just a simple means of identification: They shape the way others think of us, the way we view ourselves, and the way we act." When I read this statement I thought about how my name affects me. What if my parents would have named me Samantha? How would that change the way I think and feel about myself? It is hard for me to imagine that I would feel very masculine if every time someone addressed me, I heard the name Samantha echoing in my ear. 

     Growing up I remember in grade school kids would make jokes at me because I had several nervous twitches. I can only imagine the types of comments that would be made toward a boy who had a "girl's name." From a very early age, we are affected by the name that our parents give us. It almost seems unfair that something that we cannot control, at least initially, plays such a profound role in the development of who we are. Wouldn't it be nice if when a child was born, he or she was given the gift of speech momentarily and could participate in a brief discussion of what names at least were off-limits? 

Don't You Dare Name Me That!!!

I Want to Be Attractive...

     Physical Attractiveness plays an important role in nonverbal communication. Like it or not, how you look matters. Chapter 6 describes that women who are perceived as being attractive "...have more dates, receive higher grades in college, persuade males with greater ease, and receive lighter court sentences." Now this doesn't mean those of us who have fallen from the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down cannot be successful communicators. The book goes on to reveal that "as we get to know more about people and like them, we start to regard them as better looking." This made me personally think about the importance of a good personality. If people are friendly and pleasant to be around, all of a sudden outsiders begin to view them as being physically more attractive! This means you can eventually become "Brad Pitt's twin" by maintaining a positive persona and building relationships with those around you. 

Wanna Look Like Brad? Work on
Your Personality!

     Another way to become better looking is by using what you've been given effectively. Maintain good posture, dress nice, use friendly facial expressions. All of these actions can potentially increase your physical appearance. 

     So even though you can't choose your name, what you look like, or who your family is, you can act the way you want others to perceive you. By becoming attractive on the inside, you are also making yourself look better on the outside as well. 

     The Farrelly Brothers directed a film entitled Shallow Hal in 2001, which does a good job portraying that true beauty is on the inside.
     Hal is a man who at the start of the film is very shallow towards women. He only cares about what's on the outside. One day Hal is put under a spell that makes it so he only sees women according to their personality. The result is rather comical as Hal's friend who still remains shallow is appalled at the types of women Hal starts to date. The fact that Hal's mind viewed a woman as being attractive when physically she in fact was not, demonstrates the point that as we get to know someone, we begin to view them in a better light if they have a good character. The image below shows that even though Gwyneth Paltrow's character was heavy enough to "tip the scale" so to speak on the canoe, Hal still saw her as being a beautiful blond...

Jack Black does not see Gwyneth Paltrow's character as being overweight
as a result of her having a kind heart.